On How This Picture Came About


This picture was taken about a month ago, so I don’t remember all the details, but it went something like this:

1. Attempt to nurse Owen.
2. Give up on nursing, make up bottle of breast milk.
3. Bottle feed Owen breast milk.
4. Help Sophie put on her Halloween monster costume, which she somehow, somewhere, found.
5. Tell James (who has woken up and is now crying) that his bottle is coming.
6. Make up second bottle of breast milk.
7. Help Sophie get out of her monster costume, which she suddenly thinks is too hot.
8. Start feeding James bottle of breast milk.
9. While feeding James, try to console Owen (who hasn’t finished his bottle) and Sophie (who is now trying to put her monster costume back on, herself, and has mixed up the neck hole with a leg hole).
10. Stop feeding James and fix Sophie’s costume.
11. Debate who to start feeding again.
12. Consider crying when both Owen and James start crying, demanding more breast milk.
13. Set up Boppy pillow and plunk both babies in it.
14. Try to bottle feed both babies at the same time.
15. Rearrange heads. Again. Again. And Again.
16. Put both bottles down and turn attention back to Sophie, who is screaming for help as now she wants her monster costume back off.
17. Insist Sophie pick something else to play with.
18. Stuff monster head between boys for added head support.
19. Pick up half-full bottles but realize that now, both boys are sleeping.
20. Leave boys as is, make coffee.

“It sometimes happens, even in the best of families, that a baby is born. This is not necessarily cause for alarm. The important thing is to keep your wits about you and borrow some money.” —Elinor Goulding Smith